Top Ten Ways to Spice Up Your Love Life

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Although it is a little bit embarrassing to admit, this is the Internet and the people will never find out who I actually am! Recently, my husband and I started to put effort into spicing up our sex life. We both felt that it had teetered off and become stale in the last few years and we wanted to get back to how our relationship was when we first met. Sex was feeling more like a chore than something we did for fun and both of us would often make excuses not to do it. When we did get down to the deed, it completely lacked passion and was like I was being intimate with a stranger. Eventually, these tendencies got the best of us and we decided to do something about it. This brings me to my first step.

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Be adults. Sit down and talk it out like mature people having a problem that both of you would like to solve. This isn't high school anymore and if both of you has noticed the problem, you need to talk about it. If only one of you is noticing it, there might be something wrong as well. What I find a little more comforting is if both of you are noticing that your love life has fallen off, then at least you have something in common and can work to make it better together. Getting your feelings out there so that your partner has an idea of what's going on inside your head is an absolutely necessary first step any couple must make towards making their sex life work again.

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Women, don't feel bad about dolling yourself up for a special night. It's very difficult to feel sexy you don't think you look sexy so spend a day at the spa getting your toe nails and makeup done and maybe you can get somebody to style your hair for you so you're more confident still. Buy a few pieces of very sexy lingerie and slip your fine self into them before your hubby gets home. This makes men go crazy because not only are you looking absolutely incredible but you are proposing sexual activities this time, which men quite simply can't resist. Even though you might be out of your element, the idea is to look and feel confident because he will know if you don't. On the other hand, you might be the most self-confident firecracker in the world who already has a closet full of sexy lingerie so this might not be the perfect solution for you. TRY IT ANYWAY! MEN LOVE THIS CRAP!

Top Ten Ways to Spice Up Your Love Life

Getting out of your town or city for a romantic getaway is always money well spent. Even if you just go to a neighbouring city or town, getting away from what is familiar might help you break out of the rut. Find a nice hotel with a big bed and lots of cleaning staff because hopefully you are going to need it. Leave your cell phones and laptops off so that are only concentrating on your spouse and no other distractions can get in the way. Sharing the day, do things that you both like instead of just accommodating one person. In the evening, go for a nice dinner and try to make the setting as personal as possible. With any luck, the lack of outside stresses will alleviate enough pressure for the two of you to actually enjoy each other's company. I know this always works for me and I really like taking trips with my husband.

Get back into the dating routine. Often, because two people start living together they rarely go out for dinner or movies with each other because they see one another every day. You need to get back in to the habit of having alone time outside of the house. Go see a movie, go for dinner or go to a concert but just do something together that you both enjoy. It shouldn't be that hard, just think back to when you first started dating and do those things.

Instead of staying in and watching television on the weekend, why not try going out for a romantic and private picnic. Find a place that is secluded but still beautiful because nature has a way of influencing people to make healthy and good decisions. Really, things I just would not have expected to happen have happened while my husband and I were out just having lunch in a very secluded park. Spontaneity is incredibly important and even though it may sound like you are creating the situation, sex doesn't need to happen here, it's just spending time with each other that's important. Building the relationship is what is important here, not physical intimacy. Although, that does have a lot to do with it later.

Accessorizing your love life is another great way to give it a shot in the arm. If all you have in your bedroom is two people and a bed, sex can get pretty monotonous and all start to feel the same. Use your imagination here because you don't need to be spending a bunch of money on toys and stuff to have fun. Just massage oils, feathers for tickling and food are great ways to add another variable to your bedroom. Odds are, you already know what turns you on so don't be shy about telling your lover what it is you want them to do to you and with what. Even if you don't know what you like in terms of accessories, give something new a try because you'll never know if you don't.

Making love in the bedroom is so clean and, dare I say it, cliched. Like I mentioned above, spontaneity is king for lovely sex and results in way better intimacy than a scheduled appointment. If you are the woman in the relationship, initiate the foreplay and lay the foundation for what could happen anywhere in the house. Kitchens are a great place to become intimate with your lover but try to keep it off the ground for your back's sake. Living room couches are much more forgiving when it comes to laying on your back so maybe that would be the next logical migration from the kitchen. Either way, neither of these places are at all like the bedroom so you will be forced to try different positions which will add variety to your recently dwindling routine.

It's been said a million times before but foreplay is incredibly important in lovemaking. Building up anticipation, just like any good movie or story, really adds to the climax and rounds out the whole experience. Don't rush into the act because that makes it seem like a task rather than something you want to do. Spend time chasing different parts of each other's bodies and holding each other as close as possible prior to any sexual activity. I don't know how to stress this anymore. The anticipation of what is yet to come is the biggest turn on I can think of and leads to me climaxing harder and longer than any other means of getting me off.

This will be more for the boys, but ladies will probably get something out of dressing up too. Hell, if you want, get your man to dress up too. There is no reason you should have to wear a sexy French maid costume while he sits in his regular clothes. See what you can do about getting him a saucy sailor's outfit but show him yours first. I guarantee that it will be much easier to convince him to get into any skimpy little thing if you are already wearing one. You know what, if you are wearing a skimpy little French maid costume, you could probably get him to do anything.

Don't be shy. If you are in a long-term relationship and the love has gone sour, speak about it. Let your lover know your innermost fantasies and secrets because if you can't share with them who can you share them with? Go one-for-one on fantasies and every time you release one of yours get your partner to tell you about one of theirs. Sometimes these fantasies won't be able to be played out because one of you is uncomfortable but don't make the other person feel bad for having that fantasy. Instead, maybe you could suggest something along the lines of the fantasy and compromise a little bit.

If you happen to be the man in the relationship, treating your girlfriend or wife like a princess and pampering her to no end is a great way to get a little. Romance exists because of women and if it didn't exist, none of us would be here. Don't ever forget this. Your female lover needs to feel special to get in the proper mood and when both of you want it, it is much better. Getting her flowers for no reason and expecting nothing in return for having a beautiful and private candlelit dinner ready for her when she comes home one evening are aces in the hole. You really can't screw those ones up.

If you have spent a number of years together and the stresses of daily life are getting in the way of your love life, you have to remain optimistic and realize that there is still a lot you can do to get your love life back. You don't need to lose your intimacy because of the hostile and bustle of everyday life but you have to make an honest effort to save it. You don't have to try all of the suggestions I've mentioned above, but adventurous people just might. Here's to reigniting the flame with you and your lover.

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